The Personal Handshake: A Simple Trick to Stay Focused in Interviews

If you have ADHD, you've probably done this in an interview: you start answering the question — but your mind keeps moving, and your answer drifts into something else entirely.

What Is Verbal Processing?

This is called verbal processing. It happens because the ADHD mind moves quickly, with many thoughts arriving at once. It's hard to mentally grab hold of just one of them. So instead of pausing to sort your thoughts first, you start talking — and think out loud as you go.

It's not a lack of focus. It's too much going on at once. But to an interviewer, it can look unfocused, and it eats into time you need for the rest of the interview.

The Hack: The Personal Handshake

Here's a simple trick I teach clients: as the interviewer is asking their question, bring your hands together in your lap, gently, like you're giving yourself a handshake.

Hold them there, relaxed, while you listen to the full question.

Use that moment to mentally form your answer — before you start speaking.

The physical act of holding your own hands gives your body one simple thing to focus on. That small anchor makes it easier for your mind to settle, instead of scattering across every thought that shows up at once.

Once your answer is formed, speak it. If you feel yourself starting to drift, you can return to the handshake to reset and bring yourself back.

Try It Before Your Next Interview

Practice it in a low-stakes moment first — on a phone call, in a meeting, even in conversation with a friend. The more familiar it feels, the more naturally it will show up when you need it most.

It's a small move. But it gives your mind one calm place to start, so the answer that comes out is the one that actually represents you.